So, this could be a post about bitterness. It could be a post asking, “what is this world coming to?” It could be a rant about the state of humanity. It isn’t any of those things.
I was caught in an online scam. I lost things because of it. I also gained things because if it.
Welcome to “The Appreciator”. The Appreciator is a perspective characterized by the question “what is the gift here?” What is the light in the dark? In the presense of The Appreciator, our gremlins and negative internal voices cannot gain traction. As a result, we can “be with” a trying experience the way we want to be, rather than being swept up in ways of thinking that zap our power or squash us.
As the impact of the online scam unfolded, I kept asking myself “what is the gift? What is the silver lining? What if this experience is happening FOR me instead of TO me?” This expereince was an opportunity to learn something-what did I learn?
I could have learned that the online community is a dangerous place full of predators. I could have learned that I was a sucker, and that my smarts had failed me. I could have learned that I needed to be bitter, jaded and guilty.
Instead I learned that I love THAT much, and am loved THAT much in return. I learned that it is never too late to drop your weapons against someone you know, so they can support you. I learned that vulnerability is powerful, and staying vulnerable is transformative. I learned that forgivness is essential–most importantly, forgiveness of self.
I learned that who I was BEING during this experience was more important than what I DID. Who I was BEING, was able to overcome and thrive from something negative. The cool thing was, I was able to do that in the moments while it was still happening.
While flowing through a human experience, even if it’s a crappy one, we can steer our ship in the direction of the influence we want to have. Was I angry? Yes. Was I stunned? Yes. Was I wondering about the moral character of some specific individuals? Yes. While those thoughts were happening, I also wanted to protect and safeguard my friends. I reached out for help and stayed honest. I cried. I steered myself and others in the direction of safety without weapons and vulnerability as a gift instead of a weakness.
I AM SUPPORTED. For this deepest level of knowing, I am awestruck and blessed.