Last night I watched the documentary “Becoming Chaz”, which is a documentary about Chastity Bono’s journey to becoming Chaz Bono. While we could discuss at length the issues facing the Transgender community (all worthy of deep discussion), today I am compelled by soemthing else–BEing and ONEness.
The story that is echoing through my head is that of Chaz’s girlfriend, who confided that when she began her relationship and fell in love with Chaz, Chaz was a girl. Chaz was Chastity. And as Chaz’s transition progressed, he became more Chaz and less Chastity. The girlfriend speaks of a “loss of softness” in Chaz, and an increase in “male” attitudes and behaviors (due to the Testosterone shots). So the relationship really “went through stuff” as Chaz became who he was meant to be, and his partner worked to find a way to BE in the relationship while also honoring her personal relationship and sexual preferences.
Today I am struck with a question: who would we BE without the chemical cocktail that swirls in us and makes us, us? If we stripped away estrogen and testosterone, what would we be left with? I marvel at the power of these substances, and the things each grows on our behalf, and also without our permission. Those chemicals can override the physical DNA of gender–what else do they have the power to override? Would it be our pure essence? How is our pure essence impacted by our hormones?
If we could remain sex hormoneless for our lifetime, who would we BE? What would we express? Would it be that innocence and oneness of childhood that can see joy and pleasure, and a friend around every corner (regardless of their gender)? During our soul searching journeys, are we really just trying to find our way back to that place of acceptance and oneness that we were naturally created under, and in part, fighting chemicals intended to help propagate the human race?
This feels like my first questions on this matter of BEing, ONEness, true essence and hormones. Thoughts?